I am constantly the butt of jokes in my family. But, I do love attention as much as I love pictures (you'll see the connection in a second). My cousin, by way of making fun of me, has given me my due attention in a whole blog post :) My husband, the Giant, too
Lets first say that Bobert (cousin) - you COUNTED each and every picture, and then evaluated them... sooo you're as big of a weirdo (your word) as I am!
Anyway, enjoy - it's hilarious :) and pretty much hit the nail on the head!
JUN 30, 2010
Wasn’t Going to Post, But Couldn’t Help Myself
I wrote this post many, many weeks ago and I wasn’t going to post it, but my habitually weirdo cousin has struck again. And now I can't help myself. Enjoy.
My cousin (Brunette) is a photo-whore.
And believe it or not, she managed to find a man that would not only put up with her photo obsession, but participate. My family joked the two of them following their engagement photos. I gave them a reprieve because engagement photos in general are cheesy.
This afternoon I was reading some older posts on both her blog and her sister’s blog when I came across Brunette’s honeymoon pictures…
There are 23 photos of the two of them. In these photos they either 1) held the camera out and snapped a picture, 2) asked someone to take a picture of them or 3) set the camera and ran back for the perfect pose.
The great humor in these 23 pictures is guessing how they were taken from the list above. Especially because in a few cases they were too far from the camera to be holding it themselves, but too awkward to be taken by someone else.
Case-in-point. “The Waterfall Scene”
In this picture Brunette is sitting on a rock in front of a waterfall while Giant is leaning down to kiss her. This picture is an example of how they either set up the camera or asked someone to snap it.
Both scenarios crack me up.
First, you have to know that Brunette is bossy as hell and Giant for the most part takes it. So if they did set the camera up, it was definitely Giant who was running back and forth. And, I say back and forth because they surely took this picture ten times until Brunette was completely satisfied. Only Brunette can look like a "gigantic ******* cow" and be 100 lbs soaking wet.
There she sits, barking orders, and when he gets back for the picture she yells NOW KISS ME. The only better picture would be her angry face and half his butt cheek. Not fast enough! It’s the quick or the dead with her.
Now the other scenario is more likely and even funnier; having someone take the photo for them. Imagine walking past a beautiful waterfall and some sweet looking couple asks you to take their picture. You kindly accept. They hand you their camera, but instead of standing there for the typical frontal pose that would highlight the beautiful waterfall, they opt for the Abercrombie photo shoot. Too bad Giant wasn't shirtless wearing a scarf or I would have definitely sent this one in.
Now in my opinion 16 of the 23 “couple” pictures were either camera set or taken by someone else. And of those 16 a vast majority was the later…except perhaps the bedroom pictures. And almost all of the bedroom pictures were just before a dinner….sans one.
“The Bathroom Scene”
Brunette!!! It’s your honeymoon for Pete’s sake. There are some things that should never be documented. And this was one of them.
The picture is of Brunette and Giant in a bubble bath holding mimosas.
Apply two of the above scenarios (they were too far to be holding the camera) and you’re in for a great laugh. If they set the camera, they’re lucky no one broke a leg jumping in and out of the bath. Flailing naked limbs, bubbles, alcohol…disaster. And the other scenario…
“Housekeeping.”
My last favorite picture was the one of their bed that had a heart and the word “Always” made with flower petals. The resort should fire whoever oversees that process, because the letters were a variation of upper and lower with an awful “W” and the heart looked more like a fat backwards Nike Swoop.
Priceless.
I love you. Thank you for a great laugh and for being such a good sport.
My cousin (Brunette) is a photo-whore.
And believe it or not, she managed to find a man that would not only put up with her photo obsession, but participate. My family joked the two of them following their engagement photos. I gave them a reprieve because engagement photos in general are cheesy.
This afternoon I was reading some older posts on both her blog and her sister’s blog when I came across Brunette’s honeymoon pictures…
There are 23 photos of the two of them. In these photos they either 1) held the camera out and snapped a picture, 2) asked someone to take a picture of them or 3) set the camera and ran back for the perfect pose.
The great humor in these 23 pictures is guessing how they were taken from the list above. Especially because in a few cases they were too far from the camera to be holding it themselves, but too awkward to be taken by someone else.
Case-in-point. “The Waterfall Scene”
In this picture Brunette is sitting on a rock in front of a waterfall while Giant is leaning down to kiss her. This picture is an example of how they either set up the camera or asked someone to snap it.
Both scenarios crack me up.
First, you have to know that Brunette is bossy as hell and Giant for the most part takes it. So if they did set the camera up, it was definitely Giant who was running back and forth. And, I say back and forth because they surely took this picture ten times until Brunette was completely satisfied. Only Brunette can look like a "gigantic ******* cow" and be 100 lbs soaking wet.
There she sits, barking orders, and when he gets back for the picture she yells NOW KISS ME. The only better picture would be her angry face and half his butt cheek. Not fast enough! It’s the quick or the dead with her.
Now the other scenario is more likely and even funnier; having someone take the photo for them. Imagine walking past a beautiful waterfall and some sweet looking couple asks you to take their picture. You kindly accept. They hand you their camera, but instead of standing there for the typical frontal pose that would highlight the beautiful waterfall, they opt for the Abercrombie photo shoot. Too bad Giant wasn't shirtless wearing a scarf or I would have definitely sent this one in.
Now in my opinion 16 of the 23 “couple” pictures were either camera set or taken by someone else. And of those 16 a vast majority was the later…except perhaps the bedroom pictures. And almost all of the bedroom pictures were just before a dinner….sans one.
“The Bathroom Scene”
Brunette!!! It’s your honeymoon for Pete’s sake. There are some things that should never be documented. And this was one of them.
The picture is of Brunette and Giant in a bubble bath holding mimosas.
Apply two of the above scenarios (they were too far to be holding the camera) and you’re in for a great laugh. If they set the camera, they’re lucky no one broke a leg jumping in and out of the bath. Flailing naked limbs, bubbles, alcohol…disaster. And the other scenario…
“Housekeeping.”
My last favorite picture was the one of their bed that had a heart and the word “Always” made with flower petals. The resort should fire whoever oversees that process, because the letters were a variation of upper and lower with an awful “W” and the heart looked more like a fat backwards Nike Swoop.
Priceless.
I love you. Thank you for a great laugh and for being such a good sport.
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