Something to say

Warning: slightly heavy subject matter.  I've been sitting on this post for a while and thought I might as well post it.


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I think a lot about the world my child(ren) will grow up in.

The other weekend my mom had me going through all of my old knick-knacks from middle and high school.  Letters, pictures, notes... it brought me back.  I kept journals for a long time - 6th grade til I went off to college!!  Some entries were ridiculous, "Today I didn't do anything! G2G now I'm tired BYE! <3 Emily"  hah!  

And some of the entries were sad.  Friends ditching me, making fun of me, writing on the bathroom walls about me, boys making fun of me for no reason and calling me hateful nicknames - and my "friends" joining in on the "fun".  It was really tough to read.  I remember some of it, but I don't remember it being bad.  But, reading through the journals (which I kept and brought home with me) I realize it was BAD!  NOTHING those people did to me was justified.  NOTHING I did called for what was done to me.  NOTHING my parents did could have helped and NOTHING my parents did caused it.  I was awkward and I was naive and I was growing up and I was bullied.

Kids weaker than me kill themselves over that shit.  

It's just not fair.
Bullying is rampant these days.  It is something I focus on outright in my classroom.  We don't laugh at one another, and my students know I HEAR EVERYTHING.  I will absolutely NOT stand for anything even borderline mean.

I'm thankful I am a strong enough person to have been able to push through it, but some kids AREN'T.

 I can't believe I got through my adolescence all in one piece!  I can't believe I kept some of those friends... I can't believe I still talked to those guys well into college!!!  Going through my past through my own words and seeing my past play out for students who I teach and see suffering every day got me thinking about what I hope for Lucy.


I am obsessed with the song, "One Day" by Matisyahu.  I posted a quick video of it a few weeks ago and since then I have been listening to it non-stop.  But it really speaks to me, and the lyrics highlight some of the hopes I have for my baby girl, and for any children Mark and I have as well as for the generation being born now: my friends' kids, my siblings' kids one day, my cousins' kids, etc. etc. 

In this post when I say 'she', know that I am talking about Lucy but I'm including all the babies of mine and of my friends and of my family who will have to grow up in a world we don't know yet.  In light of quite a bit of sad and crazy bullying stories that have ended in death, suicide or otherwise, and with a world that is changing so drastically every single day, I can only hope the world our future children have to grow up in gets better and better....

With the help of the lyrics to the song I mentioned, I want to "write" down what I hope for my baby girl.  My hopes for who she will be, for who she encounters, for what she encounters, for what she does...


Sometimes in my tears I drown

But I never let it get me down
So when negativity surrounds
I know some day it'll all turn around


+I hope my daughter isn't brought down by negative people.  I hope she is able to ignore their attitude and come up with her own opinions.

+I hope my daughter isn't one of the negative people.  I hope she is always able to see the glass as half-full.


Because

All my life I've been waiting for
I've been praying for
For the people to say
That we don't wanna fight no more
They'll be no more wars
And our children will play


+I hope she is able to accept all different kinds of people.  I hope she has no discrimination against any race, religion, ethnicity... I hope she's able to accept people as people and surround herself with good ones. 

+I hope that she chooses her friends wisely.  I hope she chooses people who lift her up instead of bringing her down.

It's not about
Win or lose
Because we all lose
When they feed on the souls of the innocent
Blood drenched pavement
Keep on moving, though the waters stay raging
In this maze you can lose your way
It might drive you crazy but don't let it faze you no way


+I hope she is independent and strong-willed.  I hope she sees that bullying leads to serious consequences.

+I hope she isn't a bully.

+I hope she isn't bullied.

+I hope if she is bullied, she is strong enough to ignore the ignorant and ugly people.  And I hope she definitely doesn't keep them in her life!


One day this all will change

Treat people the same
Stop with the violence
Down with the hate
One day we'll all be free
And proud to be
Under the same sun
Singing songs of freedom

+I hope she is able to treat others the way she wants to be treated.

+I hope she is proud to be who she is.  That she has self confidence no matter what.

+I hope that she makes good choices.

+I hope I am able to, and Mark is able to accept and respect her choices whatever and whoever they may be.

Sorry for the kinda deep/serious topic!  It's just something I think of especially now that I'm a mama.  It's a scary world out there and I only hope that I am making the right decisions as far as parenting goes and all I can do is the best I can and hope that my kids turn out okay.  


I'm not an overly religious person, but I came across this blog post the other day and it made me think.  We will do our best and whatever happens, happens.

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Check back later this week for some of the Pinterest recipes I've made in the last few weeks that we have LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVED!!! :)


Also, this weekend is Valentine's Day weekend - we don't celebrate but it has become a tradition to go out with my sis and Chris so I'll be posting about that soon too.  


Felt like I needed to tell you what's coming up after the bullying post...
:)
xo